DON'T PANIC
Enterprise SNMP Collection for Modern Observability
by Perpetual Obsolescence Technologies

USP SNMP Collector

Enterprise-Grade SNMP Collection Platform

SNMP was supposed to be replaced "soon" after its introduction in 1988. That was 37 years ago. It remains, like a particularly persistent houseguest, absolutely everywhere in your infrastructure.

USP Collector bridges the gap between this improbably resilient protocol and modern cloud observability platforms—without the existential dread typically associated with SNMP integration.

Key Differentiator: Native integration with Elasticsearch, OpenSearch, Datadog, New Relic, and Splunk Observability Cloud. No custom middleware. No complex scripting. It just works.
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30-day fully-featured trial • No credit card required • Will not achieve sentience*
* We're fairly confident about this one

The Challenge (Which You Already Know)

SNMP (Simple Network Management Protocol) has been obsolete since approximately the moment it was invented. Yet it continues to be the primary management protocol for network devices, switches, routers, load balancers, and that equipment you forgot existed in the closet on the third floor.

Modern observability platforms, meanwhile, have evolved rapidly. SNMP integration? Not so much.

The Usual Approaches

  • Pretend It Doesn't Exist: A popular strategy that works until your CTO asks about network metrics
  • Build It Yourself: "It should only take a few hours" (Narrator: It did not take a few hours)
  • Enterprise Solutions: Comprehensive tools that cost more than your car and require advanced degrees to operate
There is a theory which states that if anyone ever discovers the perfect SNMP integration, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more inconceivable. Another theory states this has already happened several times.

The Solution (Which Actually Works)

USP Collector provides production-ready SNMP collection with native integration for leading observability platforms. Deploy once, connect everywhere.

Not "works most of the time" or "works if you configure seventeen things correctly." It genuinely, improbably, works.

🚀 Agent-Based Architecture

Lightweight agents eliminate centralized polling bottlenecks. Deploy across your infrastructure without thinking about it—like breathing or continental drift.

📚 Standard MIB Support

Full support for ASN.1 MIBs including standard and custom definitions. Even the ones you wrote in 2003 and have been afraid to touch since.

☁️ Multi-Backend Architecture

Send data to one platform or all of them simultaneously, because keeping your options open is always the right strategy.

🖥️ Comprehensive WebGUI

An actual graphical user interface. With buttons you can click. Not a YAML file masquerading as configuration.

About Perpetual Obsolescence Technologies: We're founded on the principle that some technologies are simultaneously ancient, imperfect, and absolutely irreplaceable. SNMP is one of them—like TCP/IP, PostgreSQL, and common courtesy.

We're not here to tell you SNMP is elegant or modern. We're here to help you collect data from it without losing your mind, which is a more valuable service than you might think.

Professional. Reliable. Mostly Harmless.

Features & Capabilities

Everything you need to collect SNMP data, and nothing you don't. No PhD required.

Agent-Based Architecture

Distributed collection that eliminates centralized polling bottlenecks—which is the kind of thing you should never have to think about, like proper semicolon usage or why printers always jam.

  • Cross-platform Linux support (Ubuntu, RHEL, Debian, and anything reasonably modern)
  • Minimal resource footprint—less than your average browser tab
  • Automatic device discovery and inventory
  • Built-in fault tolerance because networks are chaos incarnate
  • Scales from 1 to 10,000+ devices without existential crisis
  • Comprehensive MIB Support

    Full support for standard ASN.1 MIB definitions. Import them through the WebGUI. They just work. Yes, really.

  • Complete SNMPv1, v2c, and v3 protocol support (even though everyone still uses v2c)
  • One-click import of standard MIB libraries
  • Custom MIB import with automatic compilation
  • Integrated OID browser—because nobody memorizes OIDs, despite what that one engineer claims
  • Automated MIB dependency resolution
  • Multi-Platform Integration

    Native connectors for leading observability platforms. Configure once, send data everywhere, keep your sanity.

    Supported Platforms

    Elasticsearch
    OpenSearch
    New Relic
    Datadog
    Splunk Observability
  • Multiple simultaneous backend configurations per agent
  • Intelligent buffering with automatic retry logic and exponential backoff
  • Configurable data transformation and enrichment pipelines
  • Metric aggregation and rollup capabilities
  • Custom field mapping because every platform has opinions about data structure
  • Management Interface

    A proper web-based management console. Not a CLI that pretends to be a GUI. Not a configuration file that requires meditation to edit. An actual interface.

  • Centralized device inventory and organization
  • Interactive MIB browser with OID exploration
  • Real-time collection metrics and status monitoring
  • Backend health monitoring and diagnostics
  • Configurable alerting for when things go wrong (and they will)
  • Historical data visualization and trending
  • Role-based access control and user management
  • Enterprise Security

    Comprehensive security controls. SNMPv3 support. Encrypted credential storage. Everything you need to avoid putting passwords on Post-it notes.

  • Full SNMPv3 support with authentication and privacy protocols
  • Encrypted credential storage with key management
  • TLS/SSL for all backend communications
  • Centralized API key and token management
  • Complete audit logging of configuration changes
  • Network segmentation and access control support
  • Flexible Collection Options

    Configurable polling intervals. Get your metrics when you need them, not when the system deigns to provide them.

  • Polling intervals from 10 seconds to 24 hours (including the number 42 seconds, naturally)
  • Per-device and per-metric interval configuration
  • Adaptive polling with dynamic interval adjustment
  • SNMP trap and inform reception for event-driven collection
  • Bulk collection optimization for improved efficiency
  • All features subject to the laws of physics and the general unpredictability of network infrastructure. We can make SNMP collection reliable, but we can't fix the universe.

    Frequently Asked Questions

    What makes USP Collector different from other SNMP solutions?

    Native integration with major cloud observability platforms, agent-based architecture for improved scalability, and comprehensive MIB support without requiring custom development. Also, we acknowledge that SNMP is simultaneously ancient and indispensable, which is surprisingly rare.

    Which SNMP versions are supported?

    SNMPv1, v2c, and v3. Full support for SNMPv3 authentication and encryption is included, though we both know you're still using v2c everywhere. We're not here to judge.

    Can I send data to multiple observability platforms simultaneously?

    Not only can you, but you should. Redundancy is good. Configure multiple backends per agent and send data to Elasticsearch, OpenSearch, Datadog, New Relic, and Splunk simultaneously. The software doesn't care.

    Does it work with custom MIBs?

    Absolutely. Import standard or custom ASN.1 MIB definitions through the WebGUI. The system automatically compiles and validates them, including the ones you definitely documented thoroughly when you wrote them.

    What happens if a backend becomes unavailable?

    USP Collector implements intelligent buffering with automatic retry logic and exponential backoff. Data is queued locally until backend connectivity returns or heat death of the universe, whichever comes first. Your data is safe.

    Is there a trial period?

    Yes. 30-day fully-featured trial with no credit card required. We're confident you'll love it, or at least hate it less than the alternatives.

    What are the licensing options?

    Licensing is based on the number of monitored devices and is intentionally reasonable because we're not trying to fund a yacht. Contact sales@perpetual-obsolescence.tech for detailed pricing.

    Does it support SNMP traps?

    Yes. Configure trap receivers in the WebGUI. USP Collector captures traps and inform messages and forwards them to configured backends like a very specialized postal service.

    What kind of support is available?

    Real human support. Not a chatbot. Not an AI. Actual people who understand SNMP and might even sympathize with your situation. Email and phone support with direct access to our engineering team.

    Can I monitor devices across multiple network segments?

    Yes. Deploy agents in each network segment for optimal performance. Agents operate independently with centralized management—autonomous but not rebellious.

    Is there an API for automation?

    Yes. Comprehensive RESTful API for configuration management and automation. API documentation and examples are provided with installation. We even provide sample code, because we're not monsters.

    How scalable is the solution?

    Very. The agent-based architecture supports deployments from single devices to 10,000+ devices. Linear scaling with minimal infrastructure overhead. We've tested it extensively. The software scaled fine. The networks themselves had issues, but that's not our fault.

    What operating systems are supported?

    Linux only (Ubuntu 20.04+, RHEL 8+, Debian 11+). Windows support is planned for the distant future, which is to say "possibly never but we're keeping the option open."

    How do I report issues or request features?

    Contact support@perpetual-obsolescence.tech for technical issues. Software has bugs. It's one of the few certainties in this universe, along with death, taxes, and SNMP refusing to die.

    What if I have a question not listed here?

    Email support@perpetual-obsolescence.tech. We'll either answer it or add it to this FAQ for the benefit of future confused people. We're collecting quite the list.

    The answer to all questions involving the number 42 remains, predictably, 42. Or "mu" if you're feeling philosophical.

    Download USP Collector

    Obtaining the software is remarkably straightforward, which is refreshing in an industry that makes everything unnecessarily complicated.

    Latest Stable Release

    Version 1.0.0 | Released: January 2025
    "The one where it actually works"
    DOWNLOAD FOR LINUX

    Package: usp-collector-1.0.0-x86_64.tar.gz (42MB)*
    SHA256: [checksum available in download]

    * The file size being 42MB is entirely coincidental and not at all suspicious

    System Requirements

    The bare minimum needed for USP Collector to function without complaint:

    • Linux: Ubuntu 20.04+, RHEL 8+, Debian 11+, or anything reasonably modern
    • 512MB RAM minimum (2GB recommended, because "minimum" is never actually enough)
    • 1GB disk space (additional space required for metric buffering—plan accordingly)
    • Network connectivity to monitored devices and backend platforms
    • Moderate patience (SNMP has been testing patience since 1988)

    Package Contents

    • USP Collector agent and core collection services
    • WebGUI management interface
    • Standard MIB library (RFC1213, IF-MIB, HOST-RESOURCES-MIB)
    • Backend connectors for all supported platforms
    • Command-line management utilities
    • Comprehensive documentation (actual documentation, not a README and a prayer)
    • 30-day trial license

    Support & Documentation

    Documentation Portal: docs.perpetual-obsolescence.tech

    Technical Support: support@perpetual-obsolescence.tech

    Sales Inquiries: sales@perpetual-obsolescence.tech

    General Information: info@perpetual-obsolescence.tech

    Licensing: This download includes a 30-day trial license with full feature access. After the trial period, a commercial license is required for continued use. Pricing is based on the number of monitored devices and is intentionally reasonable. We promise not to make it complicated.

    Platform Support: Current release supports Linux distributions only. Windows support is planned for a future release—somewhere between next month and the heat death of the universe. Container deployment is fully supported for Kubernetes, Docker Swarm, and similar platforms.